11.17.2004

update

three cheers for me! i've gotten to a third blog entry. usually, i start these things and leave them unfinished. ahh.. such a triumph. not that it matters much since only 3 people read this thing, if that.

so much has happened since i last posted: my brother got married, ramadan came and went, and i'm 4 weeks closer now to finally wrapping up my college career, inshallah. thank the lord! when i get pictures of my brother's wedding, i'll post them. i love desi weddings! the ones here don't compare to weddings back in pakistan or india. but still, we know how to partay! woo woo!! i got to see tons of familia, especially from my mom's side, don't see them too often. either way i got to wear fancy clothes and fancier jewelry. it was fabulous. plus, i love my new bhabii.

today was a good day. interesting to say the least. (and when i say today i mean earlier on tuesday since i'm still up at 5am). for some odd reason, i've been feeling out of sorts lately. like i've got all this pent up anger/sorrow/resentment but its ambiguous- not sure what's the cause? i know one reason is not having given myself enough "me time" recently. its usually easier to focus on other things and other people than to deal with one's own pile of shite.

i had a really good conversation with a good friend today. it helped diffuse some of the negative feelings i've had. i love good conversation. not just idle talking, or "shooting the shit." but actual, real conversation. the sort of talk where people are so honest and candid, you gain insight about the person, that they don't even have about themselves. there is something to be said about a friend when they can make your mind do mental gymnastics. (not like i could ever do physical gymnastics, thats fo' sho'). it also really made my day because i think i've been feeling down, thinking about past relationships i've had with people. i appreciate every friendship i've had, for what its worth. sometimes, though, its hard to think about how much you can care for another person, and then next thing you know, you're not even speaking to them. it's just a little weird.

regardless, tonight's conversation made me realize i'm blessed, alhamdhulillah. i'm blessed to have such fabulous friends, where we can practically say whatever we're thinking/feeling. one thing i will surely miss when i leave Mad-town and my "omnipresent availability."